Esteem

How much rejection can one person take? It's just so much.

Of course, in an economy like this, getting laid off from one's job is nothing personal. But it's hard to not take it that way.

And every little rejection, every non-answer to a job application, every time you feel like an offer of assistance is fruitless ... it just adds up to rejection. To feelings of rejection, anyhow. And it's hard to not take it personally.

Your friends who have been there will tell you not to take it personally. Your former co-workers will remind you of what a hard worker you are. If they are still at the company, they will tell you how much things stink without you. Everyone will tell you that it's not you - it's the company/economy/etc ...

Sound familiar? "It's not you ... it's me".

I'm coming to the anniversary of an "It's not you ... it's me" conversation. And I'm unemployed due to an "It's not you ... it's the business" conversation. And, in my head I know that both those things are true. I know that the relationship wouldn't have worked out well (and A sent me a link to a horoscope site that basically said it was doomed from the start). Doesn't mean the "it's not you ... it's me" conversation didn't send me into a tail spin for a very long time. As for the job ... things were tumultuous right before I was laid off (one of the owners was very verbally abusive to me and to most of the rest of the staff) and I had been putting feelers out for something better, but I was still taken completely by surprise when the "it's not you ..." conversation happened. Even if I know I will, eventually, find something better.

At times like this, the unemployed gal just wants a little ego boost. A little pick me up. Something/someone to make her feel like there's a reason to get out of bed in the morning. There are a ton of blogs out there about being single in NYC. There are a ton of blogs out there about being unemployed right now. I'm not trying to combine the two - but they're both facts of my life ... and it'll come up from time to time.

Thanks for reading/following ... it takes a little bit of the sting out of the daily rejection ...