Resolve

Today starts a new year, dear readers, and with the new year come resolutions for that year. We think of how we want to better ourselves. We think about what we need to do to further our goals. We think of vices we have and which ones we should leave behind with the old year. Your MatchGirl is no different. No, certainly not. I have spent a lot of time, over the past couple of days, thinking about a new year's resolution for this new decade.

So, this morning (not that early) I walked through Williamsburg and Greenpoint, before many people were awake. It was quiet - near silent - on Bedford Ave and kind of gorgeous and I was in quite a good mood. Honestly, I couldn't help but smile as I walked up the street, thinking about my lovely night, spent low key with old, dear friends, and about all the possibilities that a new year, a new decade, even a new morning, bring.

Earlier, a friend asked me if I had made a New Year's resolution. And, gentle ones, indeed I had. I feel like this was the first year in a long time, when asked that question, that I could answer right away.

I told him this: "Yes. To have no expectations."

Now, some of you may say that this is not so hard to do. But, for your MatchGirl, it's not as easy as it seems. We go through this life expecting a lot - of friends, of events, of lovers, of places - and it's all so very depressing. Sometime in the past few months, I started trying to lower my expectations. That's not to say that I don't hope that people treat me well or with respect. That's not to say that I don't want a lot from life and it's not to say that I'm not worth a lot. It's simply to say that we put such high importance on how something is going to turn out or how someone is going to act - we spend so much time thinking three steps ahead that we don't ever revel in the moment. So, for this brand new decade, I resolve to take life as it comes, to revel in the moment and not to expect how anything will turn out (or anyone will act).

Wish me luck!

image courtesy the LIFE photo archive on Google